I cannot believe how much I have to tell all of you! I feel like I cannot even explain how much I love this work!
Thank you all for your prayers on my behalf. It's amazing how much we can all feel the prayers. They were telling us that we are probably the second most people to get prayed for next to the prophets and apostles. That's pretty special! And we can for sure feel them. As you know our week was pretty crazy at first with Lawanna on Monday. We were very discouraged and could feel Satan working on us. As we tried to prepare better for our other investigators we only became more discouraged. It was hard. At first they started to tell us to teach with the spirit, then teach a lesson. We did both, and neither were working for us, we had to learn how to do both of them together.
Rewind.
I get really off track. So, Monday... Lawanna... discouraging.
Tuesday, I seriously do not remember what we did on that day. Probably lots of classes and teaching our other investigators Rob and Kirk (who are actually our teachers).
Wednesday was the worst day. I don't even know how we could have a worse day than this.
We had been preparing to teach Lawanna since Monday. We even pray about our fake/real investigators. We searched the scriptures and PMG to figure out how we could help her feel God's love for her. We went in ready to teach, but very humble.
I had the impression that we should teach her about the Atonement because that is how we can all know for ourselves that God loves us (don't worry, in our last lesson we had already tried to teach her to pray but she wouldn't have it).
We started teaching her about that. It wasn't going well. She was still looking off and was acting like she didn't care about what we were saying. Sister Lee started to share a quote that she had hear in one of our devotionals- "If we want to know answers we must get on our knees and pray. If we want to find them we must search the scriptures." She wasn't even done saying the quote and Lawanna interrupted and said- "ya'll aren't teaching me anything" she then started to go on about something and then said- "never mind"
Ok. Break.
I just got back from dinner and such... but we SAW Lawanna walking as we were coming down here to do our laundry. Scariest. Moment. Of. My. Life. NO. JOKE.
Ok. Now that we are over that... let me continue...
So we didn't actually know what to say after that. Sister Lee finished her quote and then she just stared at us... very.... freaky. Then Sister Sliger chimed in and started talking about God's love for her (again... yes... this is like the 7th time). She wouldn't look and me and Sister Lee for the whole rest of the time. But Lawanna listened and her face got really soft. She told Sister Sliger that her answer was exactly what she needed to hear today. She then told us a personal experience about her friend being murdered... After she was finished both Sister Lee and I told her thanks for sharing that story with us and that it touched our hearts. She looked at the both of us straight in the eyes and said- "ya'll (me and Sister Lee) didn't have patience with me" she then turned to Sister Sliger and told her how much she appreciated her answering her question and told her that she would remember her name.
Talk about slap in the face. I could barely hold the tears back as we told her goodbye.
We got into the hallway and just cried. Wait, balled actually. The kind where weird noises come out of your mouth and you just can't control it. Sister Sliger had done so good, and we were so proud of her, but we had literally been crushed. We thought this time we would do better, but really it was a million times worse.
Both of us questioned why we were even here. It was so hard to hear that you don't have patience for someone when all you've been doing for the past couple days is been praying for and about her, and searching fervently to find her answer. I cannot even tell you how sad we were.
Everything and anything would make us cry. We literally cried for an hour straight. I'm not exaggurating. Everything set off the tears. People in the hall, sitting in class, our Elders, thinking about it, talking about it in class. Right when we finally thought we had control, we would start thinking about it again and couldn't stop crying. So imagine me and Sister Lee in class doing this. We just went on with class and us crying. Our Elder's were so sweet, but they thought we were freaks. Let's just say, only Sister Lee and I truly know how it feels. Others tried to help and understand, it didn't help much. We just needed to cry.
We didn't know what we had done wrong. We know that others connect with certain investigators, but she just shot our confidence even more than it already was. We didn't even think that was possible. I felt like someone had just yelled in my face and asked me why I was even here because nothing was working. And it was true, none of our investigators were doing well. The Elders would come in cheering saying- "they committed to baptism" and other things. While we just sat there and cried. All I wanted was my mom to tell me everything was ok. But, Sister Lee and I had each other.
We realized after our teacher gave us a lesson that we cannot teach by the spirit alone, or a lesson alone. We need to plan, and listen to the spirit. The first time we had only taught our lesson. The second time, we had only taught by the spirit.
The rest of our day was not good. We tried to be happy like everyone had said, but I cannot even explain how hard it was.
I finally realized the "hard" that everyone was talking about.
We weren't doing much better for the next couple days. All our teachers and investigators kept telling us, "confidence Sisters. Confidence."
We just couldn't do it! All we needed was a time where we did good on our lesson. That just wasn't happening.
Today it FINALLY DID! We cannot stop smiling! We planned our lesson and taught by the spirit! BOTH of our fake/real investigators commited to baptism!!!!! They aren't real, but they just seem so real! We finally feel like we are ready to leave to Florida on Monday!!!
Now.... This is the good stuff....
Sister Sliger wasn't feeling good Tuesday or Wednesday. Elder Morse finally convinced her to go to the clinic after we passed him a note under the table at our infield training on Wednesday.
We went to the clinic. She thought nothing was wrong. Neither did the doctors. They took her temp and it was a little high. They still weren't concerned. They decided to look at her.
10minutes later they call us all back (Sister Lee and I and Elder Morse and Busch. The other Elders were in a different room in infield and had no idea what was going on). We see Sister Sliger sitting in a room. They tell us to look at a picture on the wall. It was of the Winne the Pooh charecters. They all had masks on and were pushing Pigglet away on a raft with a stick. We started to laugh and then were like.... wait what? They told us she had Influenza B and that they were going to put her in isolation for a few days. They they gave us all this medicine to take so they we would not get it since we had all been around her. It was pretty sad. Elder Morse and Busch went and got Elder Raia and Edwards to tell them to come and get some medication and to get tested because Elder Raia had been sick. Luckily, he just had a head cold. He was glad though cuz they told him to take naps haha.
We laughed because we had to take her back to our room to get stuff for the white wall place. We had to wear these awesome masks. We felt pretty cool. Then she drove away on this golf cart thing....
It was pretty eventful. We are all fine. We basically just pop our pills all together at lunch. She just got out of isolation today and we were able to go into the real world (to Rite Aid) to get a perscription. I know we've only been here a week, but it feels like it's been eternity.
This week has been eventful and hard. We finally feel prepared and confident. Our teachers that we taught today as fake investigators said there was a night and day difference in our teaching. They also said that we've come as far if not farther than the missionaries that were here for 3 weeks. We are so sad to leave our Elders. We want to convince someone to send them to Florida with us, but we also can't wait to get out and do real missionary work!
This church is true!
Thank you all for your letters and packages!
Wait... I forgot some stuff...
So I just came back for the 3rd time... We were at gym. My favorite thing ever.
Story time...
I beat all our Elders in speed... twice... and so did Sister Lee. We know it's because they are really good, but we are just really that much better. Annnnnnnnd just told I bet a whole other bunch of Elders.... yep... it's still here.
Remember that time I told you about how we laughed so hard we almost peed our pants? That was what happened 2 days ago, but it was for the whole entire day. Me and Sister Lee were on crazy pills I think (Sister Sliger still in the white wall place...).
Everyone said that we would laugh the hardest here, and cry the hardest. Let's just say, that is 100% true.
Sister Lee is the bread (if you only knew that bread is a million times better than best).
Mom- will you please send me some dry shampoo Kenra is the brand Sister Lee uses and I love it! You might be able to find it at Sally's. But don't worry if you don't.
Quote from Sister Lee-
"Without faith there is no power."
Now we shall see the other side of her-
Another quote-
"Sometimes, I wish I was black."
-Sister Lee
Also- Sister Lee and I have so much in common that when we say something and we don't have it in common, that is when we are surprised. But that has yet to happen. We pray we will be companions in the field. Haha I can't even tell you how much I love her! She reminds me of my sister Ashley and one of my best friends Amanda :) Let's just say, that's pretty much the best combination ever!!!!
I love ya'll more than you know (just practicing... besides... I don't really know how to spell that....haha)! Thanks for you letters and packages.... wow... I'm repeating myself. Must be a combination of the food, the pills, our crazy Elders, and my amazing companion and our late night talks (we know each others whole lives... and we learned how importance obedience is).
Never forget how much our Savior has done for us and how grateful I am to be representing Him as a servant of God!
Love, Sister Calder :)
*Mom, will you please proof read this, I didn't have time, and the spelling thing is being weird...